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DEPRESSION
Depression
Disconnects People From Themselves Even
the basics--like eating, sleeping, and paying attention--move from
"automatic pilot" to problems. People locked in the grip of
depression struggle to meet the most minimal demands on their resources.
Getting through the day tends to "use up" all of a person's
energy, making it difficult to feel desire or joy. This is often
worsened because a person may have trouble remembering that they
actually once had those feelings or believing they might experience them
in the future. Depression
Disconnects People From Their Loves Ones Intimacy--whether
it's laughing over a private joke in the living room or making love in
the bedroom-is a quiet, but devastating casualty of depression.
Depression sufferers don't have much energy left over for intimate
relationships. A depressed person's partner has a ringside seat to
observe the painful process of disconnection. Misery, in this case, does
not love company, and often causes couples to withdraw from each other. Depressed
people sometimes transfer their inner pain to something or someone
outside themselves. Partners may become the target of anger, blame, or
dependency. They can feel abandoned, confused, frustrated, and fearful
about the future. They may resent the extra burdens they have to bear as
a result of their partner's illness. Sometimes the stigma of depression
can both isolate partners from others and deny them the social support
they need. Depression
Makes Forming to New Connections Very Difficult How
do people deal with the tremendous loneliness that depression introduces
or intensifies in their lives? Finding and starting a new relationship
demands many things the depressed person doesn't have--energy,
initiative, and the sturdy self esteem necessary to make new
connections. Depression can make it impossible for them to put their
best foot forward in meeting people and can take away the desire to meet
new people at all. If people with depression do manage to summon the
courage and energy for new encounters, how do they explain it to the new
people in their lives? developed
by Martha Manning, Ph.D, clinical phychologist and program participant
who has personal experience with depression. "Intimacy
and Depression: The Silent Epidemic" is an awareness campaign
sponsored by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT)
and the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA).
The campaign is supported by an educational grant from Glaxo
Wellcome Inc. More
About Depression The
mental health profession categorizes depression as a mood disorder, but
also recognizes that its symptoms can vary widely from one person to
another. It is also accurate to think of depression as a complex problem
that can affect many different aspects of the sufferer’s life. It can
affect the body,
and generate such physical symptoms as insomnia, fatigue, appetite
disturbances, diminished sex drive, and anxiety. It can affect the mind,
interfering with the ability to think clearly, notice and remember
details, and make good decisions. It can affect emotions,
causing feelings of sadness, despair, guilt, worthlessness, and apathy.
It can affect behavior,
leading to alcohol or drug abuse, suicide attempts, and other socially
or self-destructive behaviors. It can affect interpersonal
(social and family) relationships,
leading to aggression, withdrawal, or marital and family distress. The
main forms of depression are: major
depressive disorder, also called "unipolar" for its
affecting only one end of the mood continuum -- depression; and bipolar
disorder, formerly called manic-depressive illness,
("bipolar" for its affecting both ends of the mood continuum
-- depression and euphoria, or mania.) Depression can also present
itself as dysthymia, a less intense and more chronic form of depression.
Major depression is far more common than bipolar disorder, and has a
much wider range of contributing factors. What
are depression’s effects on personal and family life? The
symptoms of depression described above make it clear: To be depressed is
to suffer. The hopelessness and helplessness that people experience when
they are depressed is more than just a frame of mind at such times -- it
is an entire way of being. People stop trying, they stop caring, they
withdraw from life, and of course, this makes them feel even worse.
Their lives deteriorate, and it affects others as well. Family members
are not immune to the depressive’s negativity -- the never-ending
complaints, the steady stream of criticisms, the lack of emotional
closeness, and the loss of the ability to have fun together. Spouses can
feel hurt and alienated, and children may feel guilty, resentful, and as
if they are to blame. In turn, family relationships can also exacerbate
depressive symptoms. How
do you know when to seek help? As
a general answer, you should seek help when depression is starting to affect your
life (your family, your job, your outlook) in negative ways, and you are
not very clear about what you need to do to prevent things from getting
worse. You
should seek help -- for yourself, loved ones, or both -- long before
things get really bad. To
be more specific, take into account the following factors when deciding
to seek professional treatment.
What
kinds of treatments are commonly used? Psychotherapy
and antidepressant medications are the two most commonly used treatments
for managing depression. Many people use a combination of the two.
People’s responses vary, of course, but these approaches hold good
promise for providing relief. Most
people have already heard of the popular antidepressant medication,
Prozac. It is only one of the many "newer generation"
medications that do, in fact, help the majority of people who take them.
Medication is a valuable tool for reducing symptoms and "raising
the floor" on depression. Speaking to a psychiatrist about the use
of medications in your particular case is the best way to explore
whether medications are viable for you. A psychotherapist can also help
you with this decision. Psychotherapy
is an non-drug alternative that is generally as effective as medication,
and in some ways is even superior (though not quite as fast-acting). For
example, people who receive therapy tend to have a lower relapse
(recurrence) rate, and tend to feel better as an active participant in
the recovery process. Psychotherapy can help individuals and families
who are dealing with depression. The most effective psychotherapies are
called cognitive therapy (which
teaches how to identify and correct distorted thinking), behavior therapy (which
teaches how to behave more effectively), and interpersonal therapy
(which teaches relationship skills). All of these are short-term
therapies, and all focus on changing things in the present. The
fact that long-term research shows the effectiveness of medication and
psychotherapy for treating depression can be wonderfully reassuring for
depression sufferers and their families. Depression is highly responsive
to good treatment, and good treatment is available from a variety of
sources. Books Feeling
Good Handbook, by David D. Burns. NAL/Dutton (1990). This book includes
techniques that enable readers to cope with a range of everyday problems
such as depression. Presents ideas of cognitive therapy through
exercises, self-tests, and forms. Mind
Over Mood. By Dennis Greenberger and Christine Padesky. Guilford (1995).
This treatment manual draws on the authors’ extensive experience as
clinicians and teachers of cognitive therapy to help readers
successfully understand and improve their moods, alter their behavior,
and enhance their relationships. The
Shelter of Each Other. By Mary Pipher. Ballantine (1996). Offers
thoughtful, practical strategies to reach families and help them call
upon their reserves of mutual nurture and support in the face of
societal, cultural, and economic pressures. Challenges readers to find
the courage to nurture and revive the families they cherish. Hand-Me-Down
Blues: How to Stop Depression from Spreading in Families. By Michael
Yapko. St.Martins (1999). Describes the role of the family system in
developing depression for both biological and developmental reasons, and
teaches specific strategies for helping families reduce and even prevent
depression in their members. Breaking
the Patterns of Depression. By Michael Yapko. Random House/Doubleday
(1997). A comprehensive, "user-friendly" book that recommends
an active, skill-building approach to self-help. Includes nearly 100
structured activities to engage the reader in learning the skills to
overcome depression. ©2006
by the AAMFT |
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